


when the sun goes down

by indigo_stars



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, Friends to Enemies, Gen, Human Disaster Anakin Skywalker, Hurt/Comfort, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Sad Ending, Sad Obi-Wan Kenobi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:47:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28226367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indigo_stars/pseuds/indigo_stars
Summary: If there was anything Obi-Wan learned in the past few months since taking Anakin on as an apprentice, it was this: Anakin Skywalker was no ordinary boy.[or; Obi-Wan grows and learns about his attachment with Anakin]
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 10
Kudos: 57





	when the sun goes down

**Author's Note:**

> finished my finals this week so i actually had time to write something

**apprentice.** ****

If there was anything Obi-Wan learned in the few weeks since taking Anakin on as an apprentice, it was this: Anakin Skywalker was no ordinary boy. 

He could feel it on Tatooine before he’d even come in contact with the boy, the intense presence in the Force. 

It nearly took Obi-Wan off his feet, coming face-to-face with Anakin. The sheer power of the Force that swirled around him, untamed and bright and full of curiosity and fear — it was a supernova, big and explosive and overwhelming. 

Shielding was something Obi-Wan immediately began to teach Anakin. There was only so much he could take before the headaches would start, and he noticed the way other Jedi would discreetly wince when Anakin was in the same room.

But Anakin was nothing but a hard worker. His nose would scrunch up in concentration when working on his lessons, when he tried to meditate with Obi-Wan, when he tinkered with spare droid parts in his free time. Where he got those, Obi-Wan did not know, but there always seemed to be some new part laying on the floor, waiting for Obi-Wan to trip on it. 

The sky was beginning to darken one particular day, turning beautiful hues of blues and purples, when Obi-Wan heard faint sniffles coming from Anakin’s room. 

Unease settled deep in the pits of his stomach — Anakin was an emotional boy, something Obi-Wan learned fairly quickly, and had zero experience on how to deal with it. With all the Jedi teachings coursing through his veins, Anakin was a nine-year-old boy in an unfamiliar place filled with unfamiliar people, without the knowledge the Jedi learned at an early age. 

Pushing himself off his bed, giving up on trying to sleep, which eluded him since Qui-Gon’s death. Every time he closed his eyes, there would be flashes of blue and green and red clashing and the life force of Qui-Gin slipping through his fingers—

Obi-Wan failed to be there for his Master. Qui-Gon was gone, now one with the Force. But Anakin was here, and Obi-Wan would not fail his new apprentice. He couldn’t.

Blinking away fatigue and releasing his pain into the Force, Obi-Wan entered Anakin’s room. 

The boy in question was hunched over a datapad, biting his lip in frustration. He was so absorbed in his work, it wasn’t until Obi-Wan cleared his throat that the boy startled in his seat.

His eyes were bright with unshed tears. 

“Master,” he said, in a small voice.

The quietness in which Anakin spoke in unnerved Obi-Wan. Anakin was an extremely vocal child, asking a million questions a mile a minute, or just simply talking about the first thing his mind thought of. In the following days of their new dynamic as master and apprentice, Obi-Wan learned more about podracing than he thought humanly possible. 

Obi-Wan crouched down next to Anakin so he was eye-level with his Padawan. 

“What’s on your mind, young one?”

Anakin bit his lip, cheeks coloring slightly. In embarrassment or shame, Obi-Wan did not know. When a few minutes passed without an answer, Obi-Wan murmured, “Anakin.”

“I don’t know how to read!” Anakin burst out, fully red now. “I mean, I know a little, but everything’s in Basic and there wasn’t anything written in Basic on Tatooine...” He trailed off, looking helpless and so very, very young.

It took all of Obi-Wan’s teachings not to let surprise show on his face. He wasn’t quite sure how to respond to this revelation either, though with more thought, it made some sense. Anakin was clearly a very bright child, but his assignments were never on par with the boy’s intelligence.

“I’m sorry,” Anakin said suddenly, taking Obi-Wan out of his train of thought. 

“What are you sorry for?” Obi-Wan asked.

Anakin was fidgeting, clearly uncomfortable. “For not telling you sooner, I guess.”

“You should have informed me,” Obi-Wan agreed, causing Anakin to hang his head in shame, “but that’s in the past now.”

“Will you help?” Anakin asked, in that small voice Obi-Wan disliked. 

“Of course, young one,” Obi-Wan murmured. He lifted Anakin out of his chair, choosing to sit and place Anakin on his lap. 

He read the first passage, slowly, tracing the words with his finger for Anakin to follow along.

*******

Months later, the grin Anakin gave him when he read aloud for the first time without stumbling over himself was so infectious that Obi-Wan found himself smiling back, fully, for the first time since Qui-Gon’s passing.

Everything would be alright.

**son.**

Standing outside the council room, Anakin would not stop fidgeting with his Padawan braid. For what seemed to be the tenth time in five minutes, Obi-Wan gently pulled Anakin’s arm down.

“Anakin, stop.”

“Sorry, Master,” Anakin said, hand reaching back up to touch his braid. Obi-Wan grabbed his hand and yanked it back down. Deciding to preserve his sanity, Obi-Wan didn’t let go. 

At least, that’s what Obi-Wan told himself, because by the end of the day, after ten long years, Anakin would no longer be his Padawan. 

That seemed to be on Anakin’s mind as well, because he didn’t pull his hand away.

His prosthetic hand began to move up toward the braid, and Obi-Wan intercepted that hand too.

_ “Anakin, _ ” he chided gently. 

_ “Obi-Wan, _ ” Anakin mimicked, grinning in a way that meant trouble.

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow at Anakin, unamused. “Stop playing with your hair,” he scolded. 

Anakin’s fingers twitched, but the young man made no move to remove his hand from Obi-Wan’s. 

“Just a little nervous, I guess,” Anakin said. 

Obi-Wan hummed in agreement, taking note of the anxiousness and excitement that was rolling off of Anakin in waves. The ceremony of becoming a Jedi Knight was a sacred occasion, shared between a student and teacher, overseen by the High Council. It was a huge honor and a big occasion, stepping up from an apprentice to a fully recognized member of the Jedi Order.

Obi-Wan had envisioned a proud look from Qui-Gin as he cut off his Padawan braid for his own Knighting ceremony. Instead, all he got was a dim-lit room with only Yoda on Naboo, before going to watch Qui-Gon’s body burn. 

“Master? Master, are you all right?”

Anakin’s blue eyes were filled with concern, and Obi-Wan flushed slightly with embarrassment — his apprentice was growing more powerful everyday, and had no doubt sensed the grief emitting from Obi-Wan.

“I’m fine, Anakin,” Obi-Wan reassured, and then, “I was just thinking about how my room will finally be filled with  _ peace  _ and  _ quiet _ —”

“Ha  _ ha _ , very funny,” Anakin said, but the smile had returned to his face. “Admit it, Master. You’ll miss me.”

“Oh yes, I will quite miss tripping over your droid parts—”

“That only happened a few times—”

“It most certainly did  _ not _ — you just never cleaned your room, no matter how many times I told you to. I do hope your new quarters will be cleaner, though I think I may be setting the bar a little low…”

“Master,” and this time, there was a clear whine in Anakin’s voice. 

Doors opened then, with Yoda stepping out. Almost in sync, Obi-Wan and Anakin both schooled their expressions, letting go of each other. Yoda eyed them for a moment, before nodding. “Ready, we are.”

The two followed Yoda into the council room. The other Masters were all sitting stoically. Obi-Wan bowed, with Anakin copying the movement. 

“Kneel, Padawan Skywalker,” Mace Windu said.

Anakin did.

“Knight Kenobi, if you please.”

Igniting his lightsaber, Obi-Wan swiftly cut off Anakin’s Padawan braid. 

Then, as one, the High Council spoke: “By rights of the Council, by the will of the Force, Anakin Skywalker, you may rise. You are now a Knight of the Jedi Order.”

As Anakin rose, Padawan braid discarded on the floor, Obi-Wan felt a lump form in his throat as he took in the sight of Anakin without his Padawan braid. The boy he raised towered over him, and Obi-Wan almost did a double-take. 

Somewhere in their time together, Anakin grew up. No longer a boy or gangly teenager, but a Jedi Knight. 

Obi-Wan strode forward, placing his hand on Anakin’s shoulder. Their eyes met, and Obi-Wan let his praise flow through their bond. 

“You’ve done well, Anakin. Congratulations.”

**friend.**

It had been a grueling week. 

First, uncovering the new threat of Death Watch, which was unnerving in of itself, then the plot to assassinate Satine on the  _ Coronet _ … yes, it has been a very long week. All Obi-Wan wanted to do was get some rest and to forget the way his heart pounded whenever he was in Satine’s presence. 

Just as Obi-Wan poured some tea, the door slid open and Anakin walked inside and threw himself on the couch.

So much for relaxation.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan said, sitting on the edge of the couch, cradling his cup of tea, “there’s a thing called knocking.”

“Really?” Anakin said, amused. “Must’ve slipped my mind.”

“Don’t you have training to do with Ahsoka?” 

Anakin waved his hand dismissively. “She’s out with Master Plo at the moment. Patrolling, or something.”

“Or something,” Obi-Wan repeated dryly, and Anakin shrugged in response. “You should keep better track of your Padawan, Anakin.”

“As you always did?” Anakin said, eyebrows raised. “And besides, Ahsoka can handle herself.”

That, Obi-Wan knew, was true. Despite her age, Ahsoka was clearly capable and a fast learner. Still, it saddened Obi-Wan to see her young life be shaped by war.

Still, even with the amount of time the three spent together, Ahsoka was Anakin’s Padawan, and ultimately it was his role to guide and teach her — not that Obi-Wan didn’t offer his services whenever he could, something he knew Anakin was grateful for.

Finally, he sighed. “Fine. Just take off your shoes, I don’t want you to get mud all over my furniture.”

“There’s no mud on my boots!” Anakin spluttered, but nevertheless, he kicked off his boots with a flourish, and Obi-Wan mourned the wall where the boots hit. 

Barely noticeable smudges appeared, and Obi-Wan resolved to clean it as soon as Anakin left.

“So,” Anakin began, and all Obi-Wan could think of was  _ oh no  _ before his former Padawan continued, “Satine.”

_ Oh no,  _ indeed. Sometimes, Obi-Wan really hates Anakin’s perceptiveness. He schooled his features into what he hoped was a neutral expression. “What about her?”

Anakin gave him a look. “Come on, Obi-Wan. It’s obvious you have feelings for her.”

Obi-Wan felt his cheeks warm up. “I fail to see how that’s relevant right now,” he said, immediately going on the defensive. He gripped his tea cup with more force than was probably necessary. 

“Yes it does,” Anakin insisted. “Isn’t how you feel about her important? Doesn’t it affect how—”

“How I feel about her doesn’t matter,” Obi-Wan said, and  _ lies lies lies _ — “I have a duty to the Jedi Order. I’ve made a commitment.”

Anakin, usually so expressive, had a blank expression on his face. Obi-Wan found it really hard to figure out what the younger man was thinking. Slowly, he reached out through their bond, only to be met with shields.

Obi-Wan tried not to feel hurt. There was once a time where Anakin would open up to him, but now… Anakin’s shields were almost always impossible to breach as of late.

“Sorry, I forgot. Attachment is forbidden.” There was an undertone of bitterness in Anakin’s otherwise monotone response.

Obi-Wan let out a breath, but decided not to respond. It was an ongoing discussion between him and Anakin, ever since Anakin was young. It frustrated Obi-Wan at times, and he had to remind himself that Anakin didn’t grow up in the Temple.

Despite Obi-Wan’s teachings, Anakin never seemed to fully understand the rules on attachment.

Attachment was something natural — something every living being experienced, even Jedi; how else would one explain a bond between a master and apprentice?

A bond that was supposed to go away, once a Padawan was Knighted. 

A bond that Obi-Wan still shared with Anakin. A bond that he still clung to. That bond, once unsteady, now strong and deep, and filled with companionship.

If Obi-Wan really was the perfect Jedi Anakin thought him to be, he should’ve been able to let go of his attachment to him. 

Instead, Obi-Wan’s attachment to Anakin grew — day by day, year by year. 

Wanting to break the tension that filled the room, Obi-Wan said, “Ahsoka’s becoming a wonderful Jedi. You’re teaching her very well, Anakin.”

Anakin looked taken aback by the sudden change in topic, before rubbing the back of his head — a tell-tale sign that he was embarrassed. 

“I just hope I can teach her as well as you taught me,” Anakin finally said.

Obi-Wan was speechless for a moment.

“You already are,” he finally said.  _ I’m proud of you _ went unspoken, but Obi-Wan knew Anakin could feel it.

A comfortable silence passed.

Then, “You got dirt on my wall.”

Anakin shot up, squinting to where his boot lay for a few seconds before giving Obi-Wan a look. “There’s nothing there, Obi-Wan.”

“There’s a smudge,” Obi-Wan sniffed, taking a sip of his now cold tea. He almost spat it back out. Cold tea was  _ not good tea _ . Obi-Wan refrained from sighing.

Anakin was now off the couch, squatting next to the wall. “There’s  _ nothing there _ ,” he repeated.

“Maybe I’ll make you clean it.” Obi-Wan mused, causing Anakin to roll his eyes.

“You’re impossible.”

“Clearly, you haven’t spent the past decade trying to train an unruly Padawan.”

Anakin spluttered.

As they descended into another daily argument, Obi-Wan was pleased to note that the tension between the two of them was gone. 

**brother.**

It was no secret that Anakin attracted trouble like a magnet. Injuries were all too frequent in his apprenticeship, causing Obi-Wan one-too-many heart attacks. 

Just the other day, he spotted some grey hairs beginning to appear. Obi-Wan had let out a sigh and tilted his head back, wondering what he did to deserve this. He wasn’t even forty, he should not be seeing  _ any  _ grey hairs on his head.

In his current situation, Obi-Wan was going to be completely grey before the week would end. 

But Obi-Wan would take having grey hair any day, if it meant Anakin was healthy and whole, blue eyes sparkling with mirth.

Instead, Obi-Wan was fighting the urge to pace along the outside of the medbay — Ahsoka was doing a fine job at that, looking incredibly panicked.

Obi-Wan had half a mind to tell Ahsoka to calm down, because pacing and fretting was not the Jedi way. After all, he’s supposed to be the voice of reason. The stability Anakin and Ahsoka needed in these times of turmoil.

Except Obi-Wan’s mind was racing, terror seeping slowly through his body. He was sure Ahsoka could sense his distress. It was the last thing Obi-Wan wanted, for Ahsoka to see him lose his composure. 

Anakin has always had a penchant for getting himself into trouble — Obi-Wan couldn’t even begin to count how many times Anakin’s been injured by acting before thinking.

From the smallest scrape to the greatest, Obi-Wan’s worry for him remained the same. Even after ten years of apprenticeship, Obi-Wan felt incredibly responsible for the young Jedi.

But this… the injury Anakin sustained in the Republic’s most recent air strike was something else entirely. His injuries spoke volumes, as even Ahsoka, with tears dripping down her face, was rendered speechless. 

It had taken over an hour to pull Anakin from the wreckage, and another half-hour to get him back to the  _ Negotiator _ . Obi-Wan and Ahsoka spent around five minutes in the medbay before Kix ordered them out. 

There was a certain heavy weight settling in Obi-Wan’s chest. He fought to keep his breathing even as he stared through the glass of the medbay, where Kix and several medics of the 501st and 212th were working tirelessly on keeping Anakin’s vitals stable.

Eventually, Obi-Wan allowed himself to sink to the floor and lean against the wall. Ahsoka followed his lead, biting her lip nervously. The two sat in silence.

Obi-Wan didn’t know how long they sat in front of the medbay by the time Kix came to them, announcing that Anakin was stable, though he would need to be placed in a bacta tank once they reached Coruscant. 

Ahsoka jumped up and ran into the medbay before Kix could finish speaking.

The relief Obi-Wan felt was overwhelming. He was sure that if he wasn't sitting, he would’ve sunk to the floor.

“You can go and see the General too, sir,” Kix murmured. 

“Yes, thank you Kix,” Obi-Wan said, though made no effort to get up. Kix stared for a moment longer, his concern clear, before going back into the medbay.

It took a few minutes, but when Obi-Wan was sure his legs wouldn’t collapse underneath him, he stood up and slowly made his way to the medbay as well. 

Ahsoka was sitting on the bed with Anakin, her hand entwined with his. She gave him a small smile as Obi-Wan pulled a chair next to Anakin’s bedside.

Anakin was still incredibly pale and his stillness did nothing to alleviate Obi-Wan’s worry. Not even a twitch of an eyelid to show displeasure.

Obi-Wan did the best thing he could in this situation, and began to run his fingers through Anakin’s messy curls. It always calmed Anakin when he was young, so he figured it would help now. 

His former Padawan wasted no time in growing his hair out after his Knighting ceremony. Obi-Wan never realized how curly Anakin’s hair could be, due to the specific hairdo Padawans must have. Somehow, it suited him.

Obi-Wan had a feeling that he wouldn’t bear to see Anakin hurt, from the moment the boy became his apprentice. 

He just didn’t realize, in this moment, that he wouldn’t be able to live if Anakin ever left his side. 

**enemy.**

Obi-Wan wondered, not for the first time, staring unseeingly at the twin suns of Tatooine, where it all went wrong.

The heat of the suns burned with the intensity of the fires on Mustafar. And in the center, clad in black, tall and murderous and yellow-eyed, stood Anakin. Broken and twisted and burning and limbless, Obi-Wan could not reconcile that image of Anakin with the bright-eyed boy who would come to him in the middle of the night for comfort. 

The boy he was supposed to protect.

Days turned to weeks, to months, to years, and still, Obi-Wan could taste ashes in his mouth, feel the burn in his lungs, and the sting of tears in his eyes.

Watching Luke grow up from afar, so strikingly similar to Anakin in both physicality and personality, shattered what was left of Obi-Wan’s broken heart.

*******

**Author's Note:**

> i’ve been a star wars fan since... birth, basically, so i really hope i did these two characters justice, because they’re idiots and i love them
> 
> any kudos/comments are greatly appreciated!
> 
> i’m now on [tumblr](https://indigostars.tumblr.com/) so feel free to come say hi :)


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